Funniest Thing I've Read All Year

Click Here to read the article at Animal Aid's website encouraging people to write to retailers of Sea Monkeys and ask that they not carry the product.
It's ridiculousness like this that makes the animal rights movement look silly, and that is a shame as it is a movement near and dear to my heart.

I see them huggin' monkeys with their sad faces in Animal Aid's logo and all I can think is, "I know what'd cheer them li'l monkeys up, a nice set of Sea Monkeys!"

Chinese Toy Scare not affecting Sea Monkeys

Are you safe buying Sea Monkeys? After all they do come in little plastic tanks with lots of plastic parts. Well, you don't have to worry. Sea Monkey accessories do NOT come from any of the plants that are currently involved in toy recalls. George Atamian assures us at www.sea-monkey.com that we're in the clear:

"All of our Sea-Monkey pouches are totally formulated and packaged in America by the inventors and creators of this wonderful & loved brand. Every batch of thse special powders are tested by our PhD expert with 45 years experience studying and analyzing all aspects of the Sea-Monkeys.

We make more than 100,000 tanks and sets in the USA and more in a factory in China with which I have personally dealt with, visited and inspected several times in the 12 years I have been associated with Sea-Monkeys.

We not only keep the lead out, but we constantly test for all heavy metals and other potentially hazardous contaminants.

My goal, and that of our world-wide dedicated Sea-Monkey team, is to provide you with a wonderful & joyous experience as you bring your Sea-Monkey pets to life and take good care of them over the years.
I wish you all health and happiness and remember…ALWAYS BE KIND TO YOUR SALTY SEA-MONKEY PALS!

Cordially Yours, George C. Atamian
Pres/COO
Amazing Live Sea-Monkeys®
Rancho Dominguez, CA USA"

Onion Head battles the Evil Sea Monkey

Not the first time you've seen a giant evil Sea Monkey ready terrorize a city. Hmmm? Did Freud ever mention the phobia of giant evil Sea Monkeys attacking the city?

Leading Cause of Death Among Sea-Monkeys

The Onion guys MUST have some Sea-Monkeys in their office somewhere. But just in case, I think I'll be sending them some. Here is another great appearance of our briney friends.

I wrote a while back about their hillarious piece on a man claiming his Sea Monkeys as dependents. Click here for that.

Bad Blogger

Why yes, I have been slacking off on my Sea Monkey blogging duties.
I'm waiting for a photo from The World Famous Lizard Boy of my meeting with George, the King of The Sea Monkeys, and then I'll write up that experience.
I'm also waiting on some great new Sea Monkey Art.
Mostly though, I'm just trying to keep my sanity as I have too many gigs this month. You see, when I'm not Sea Monkey blogging I'm a comedian. Things should be back to normal next week.